With a Heavy Heart

It is with a great disappointment that I have resigned this past week as the Assistant Women’s Basketball Coach at Sacred Heart University due to family concerns.

With the birth of our second child in early June, it was becoming more and more apparent to me that I did not really know our new addition. Like most parents, I was trying to stretch time at both ends – work and home – and I felt that I was failing as a father and did not want to fail as a coach.

I cannot thank Head Coach Jessica Mannetti enough for hiring me and giving me the opportunity to join her staff. Everyone at Sacred Heart was so very welcoming and I truly enjoyed each and every day I went to the office. Coach Mannetti’s friendship, understanding and support during this decision shows her leadership and compassion for her staff despite her desire to keep me on board.

I wanted to make sure this decision was not rash, yet still make a relatively quick decision in order to give Coach Mannetti the utmost time to find my replacement. It is nerve racking to leave a job, when you do not have any other work lined up, especially when you have a family to help support. However, I felt it was the right thing to do given the circumstance.

I would also like to thank the Coach Yolanda Cole, Coach Ali Heller, the SHU student-athletes and support staff. You are all great people who are dedicated to your craft and I will miss working with you.

Not only was this a difficult decision because of my journey to get back on the sidelines this past season, but also because I felt that we had a great chance to win the NEC and move to the NCAA tournament this season. I will surely be cheering the Pioneers on throughout the year.

I have never been anything but all in and know that I cannot change that approach. I think right now, as a division I assistant though there are certain requirements that the job entails, which are necessary in order to assist in running a championship level program. I had to make a value judgement of myself and my priorities and I did not think I could have performed at the level that Coach Mannetti and the student-athletes needed me to, and at the level which I know how to and expect myself to work at, without sacrificing a tremendous amount of time with my family.

This sacrifice was not the right approach for our family at this time unfortunately.

To all of my friends who have called me and offered their support and encouragement, I appreciate you all.

This was a hard decision but it was the right one…And although it was the right decision it is still a very bittersweet one as well.

I have met many great people in the game and know I have positively influenced the lives of so many of my former players and assistant coaches. Some solace for me during this decision is that I know that I can hold my head high and am confident that I have treated all those I worked for, coached with and been a coach for, as best I could and given it 100% all the time.

The wins are great, but the relationships will always last and will always mean the most to me.

Players and coaches, as always, if I can help you with anything, please do not hesitate to ask.

Follow Bert DeSalvo on Twitter @CoachDeSalvo

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

3 comments on “With a Heavy Heart

  1. Russ Gregg says:

    I totally understand your decision. With a 18 month old myself, I have chosen to turn down opportunities to advance in order to keep my family first. I am very proud of you and what you stand for.

    Russ Gregg
    Head Women’s Basketball Coach
    Erskine College

  2. maasociety says:

    I appreciated your heart-felt letter describing how difficult your resignation is. As a stay-at-home dad for three years (and happily returning to full time work this fall), I can relate to how tough it is to try and navigate the sometimes diverging streams of what’s best for the family and what’s best for your personal fulfillment outside the family. You are a good man, Bert. Keep putting one foot in front of the other as best you can. Much respect from your old high school economics student teacher…

  3. Cy says:

    I totally understand your decision. I had the opportunity to go as a D-1 assistant & I was told I’d be a head coach in 4 to 5 years. However, I’d be away from my family during those years because of the full-time commitment of being a coach. I had no problem with the commitment but could not leave my family for coaching . My sons were very young at that time.
    I was lucky to have a teaching job, which I loved, so it made my choice much easier. I do not resent making that decision. I’ve been very fortunate to have great young men & women in my coaching career and have been successful at every level, but my greatest thrill has been hearing from former players how I was a great influence in their lives.
    I wish you the BEST in all your future endeavors!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s